u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
