He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
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