What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
