I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
