I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
