So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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