Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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