I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
