haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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