My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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