I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
