We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
