We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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