i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
