Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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