Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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