You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
