think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
