I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
