I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
