would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
