Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
