I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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