you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
