Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Shitshow foam night was such a success
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Randomize
