...so i touched it.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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