So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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