Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
