Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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