I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize