you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
