Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just high enough for therapy.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
