you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
