mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
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