How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
