I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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