Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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