You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
