I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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