her vagina looked like bernie madoff
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
