I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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