i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
It was confusing and full of hummus
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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