My brain says no but my pants say off.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I just gift wrapped bread.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Randomize
