I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
