did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
