I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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