so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
