He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
