I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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