Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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